It's Okay to Not Be Okay
If you’re experiencing burnout, decision-fatigue, or overwhelm, know you’re not alone and what you’re feeling is absolutely okay.
It’s not said enough, so we’re here to help make it clear - it’s okay to not be okay.
We live in a society that values and promotes quick-fixes, goal-setting, and moving forward quickly. Because we are immersed in these expectations, it may feel overwhelming and frustrating if you’re feeling “stuck” in emotions, thoughts and feelings you aren’t used to.
Please know, a lot of people just like you experience mental exhaustion. It’s normal, and not just that, it’s okay!
What if we flipped the goal-focused script? Instead of pushing incessantly forward toward goals that don’t necessarily define growth, what if we decided that rest, self-nurturing and healing was the very growth we need?
Instead of focusing on striving, goal-setting and pursuing any kind of “fix,” we encourage you to lean into self love and self acceptance and focus on doing your best to take care of yourself when you need it most.
You’re Not Alone in Burnout
Mental exhaustion and decision fatigue are serious symptoms of burnout, caused by extended periods of stress and emotional and mental exertion (looking at you, 2020 and 2021).
Symptoms of burnout can look like a general lack of interest, motivation or optimism or feeling a lack of purpose and direction in life. It can also cause an individual to have difficulty relaxing, sleeplessness, insomnia, irritability, and can even cause chronic health concerns in some cases.
You don’t have to push through it or fake happiness or energy, and you don’t have to focus on doing things you hope will resolve those feelings of burnout. Our society pushes goals, stretching forward, and pushes a rhetoric of becoming “more” in order to fix any problems you might be feeling in your present life.
Pursuing goals is great, and we aren’t here to burn any helpful resolutions and intentions. However, we want to set the record straight that pursuing contentment, and learning to sit with your current feelings and achieving rest are powerful goals in and of themselves. You are free to sit with your feelings and reject any expectation of striving, fixing, solving.
Moving Through Exhaustion and Burnout
So, how do we move forward when we feel stuck in burnout and exhaustion? Here are a few of our suggestions.
Reflect on where you’ve been. Every chapter is a part of your story. Every season is leading you to where you are going - you don’t have to discount the struggles you’ve experienced. Reflect on what you have experienced and, if it helps, practice objectivity. You can notice what you’ve experienced without having to put a positive spin on anything. What has happened? How has it affected you? How will your past experiences inform the direction you’d like to take from here?
Practice acceptance and self-acceptance. Acknowledge, accept and affirm what you’ve been through. It may feel like a mountainous task, but accept this part of your story and begin to accept that the next chapter will come. One season always follows another.
Seek balance. Remember your body craves equilibrium - how are these feelings asking you to balance things out? Burnout is not something to ignore or resent. Instead, welcome your feelings and symptoms as information telling you how to restore balance. If you’re feeling tired, can you rest? If you’re feeling uninspired, can you write a short poem? Small, nourishing steps is all it takes.
Make a change. Change your environment and input if need be. Can you decrease stressors, change your sensory input, get outside, or talk with someone you love?
Talk with someone. When you need someone to talk to, someone in your corner who can sit in the “not okayness” with you, find a counselor you trust. If you need help taking this step, here are a few tips on how to find the right therapist for you.
At the end of the day, the first step to moving through and healing from burnout and exhaustion is to recognize that these feelings are loving messages from our hearts and minds. Burnout is not something to resent or push under the rug in hopes it simply goes away - it is not a danger to our wellbeing, but a request for balance and rejuvenation from within.
How can you take steps today to listen to the messages your heart and mind are sending you? What will you do with the information you find? Burnout is not your status quo forever - it is a chapter, and the pages are still turning.